Ohhh... So This is Called "Lifestyle Creep?"

It was in 2016 that I started to document my spending, aka a budget, but did not write my efforts to get out of credit card debt. *Sigh* I remember during this time I stopped feeling like a lowly paid worker and thought I was finally going to be building a better life for my family and myself. I can also say that I had no clear plan of what to do with my "extra" funds and had no understanding how to actually build that "better" life I ambiguously thought I deserved. I think most will know where I am going with this little anecdote to follow.

When I arrived at the office of my first real job, I received a tour of the space and was shown my own cubicle office. I was so thrilled to have colleagues and my own cubicle because it solidified I was truly an adult who was contributing to society. Well, all shiny things lose their luster. Most know that a new job requires learning a vast amount of new information, software programs and maintenance procedures, and internal/external contacts in what feels like a short amount of time. I have a perfectionist-esqe personality that demands my brain commit all of myself into learning new skills/information that it didn't take long for me to feel a little crispy (burn out) from working so hard in the new position. During my early days at the office I passed eating lunch with coworkers because I always seemed to be slower at completing the work tasks that others were so familiar with. One day at work, I thought you deserve to go out to lunch sometimes with coworkers and you have the money to do it. So when it came time for the usual lunch exodus I finally joined in to get out of the office and socialize. I figured this would be good for me to talk to coworkers outside of the earshot of our managers. I started setting aside $20 dollars per paycheck for work lunch so I could at least go to lunch with coworkers at least 1 time per week. While my son was in daycare I received a flyer for this mobile jump/tumbling bus that would come every week and offer their services for a fee. Well in my mind I equated that being a good mother meant my son had to participate and he would have so much fun doing this unique activity. For the low price of $35 dollars a month my kid could be having extra fun at daycare where he was staying at longer than he used to before because of my frequent late work schedule. And since I work so hard at my new job I thought it was only fair that I get something out of it too, besides a paycheck and benefits. I was scrolling a fashion blog or Pinterest board when I saw a well-dressed woman with clothes I wanted. I clicked to see where the outfit came from and stumbled onto the Nordstrom website and their anniversary promo sale. If I signed up for a credit card then I could receive $20 dollars in credit to use on my first purchase. I still remember how late at night it was that I was mentally going back and forth with my conflicting feelings of desire and guilt. In the end my desire to splurge on myself won. I was approved for a Nordstrom store card and was ready to spend the instant store credit and credit card on items that would make me feel great even though I was mentally drained from my new job and feeling empty inside.

As I reflect on my net pay to spending, I cannot fathom how I made this work because my extra funds were going to rising daycare cost for me. I was able to save some money but I also remember this being the time where I was using my credit cards more to pay for expenses that I was short on cash for like groceries, dining out, or "emergency" purchases. *Cough, cough* that really weren't essential. 2016 was my baby phase into adulthood. At this time, I still was not paying for rent or utilities as I previously mentioned but I was paying myself more (aka savings) which sounded great aloud. Not true in applied reality.

Running Debt Total as of 02/19/2016

Credit Card 1- $1,829.00

Credit Card 2- $2,578.18

Grand Total = $4,407.18

Takeaway One

I am not going to criticize others' choices of how they decide to spend their money. I will point out my own thoughts of how I illustrated a disconnection between my goals and actions. I wanted to build a better life for myself and I "felt" I was doing that by splurging on my family and myself because I was making more money. Its the way I was treating myself. Self-care is so important and although it is propagated at nauseum it is seldomly taken seriously. Lifestyle creep was eating into my self-care because I thought I had money to burn on non-essentials more often than I needed to indulge in on material goods because I was feeling unhappy and over-worked. I was aware of low cost (and free) ways to decompress and treat my body and soul but chalked it up to I didn't have the time for it. I had the time. If I was scrolling late at night, hunting my next retail conquest like it was a magic formula, then I had the time to treat myself to something more enriching like yoga, physical activity, connecting with family/friends, or a new or old hobby.

Takeaway Two

Charging on a credit card will cancel out any strides made on savings because you are taking money away from your future self. I would find myself over budget on groceries costs even though I tried to say on budget. Instead of dipping into the money I saved I used my credit card to pay the bill. Even worse, I didn't pay the credit card bill what I budgeted for the groceries. I paid my increased payment of $75 dollars. This misstep in personal budgeting hampered my ability to use credit cards responsibly and how to adjust other expenses appropriately. In my grocery overspending scenario, I could have either forfeited a few items in the cart (its not embarrassing, its keeping things real), or increase the grocery budget which would make my savings and debt payoff plans more realistic. Charging on a credit card to avoid dipping fingers into other viable funds is not smart. It hurts you in the long run on making progress with your debt since you are creating MORE debt. It may seem like a basic and easy peasy tip but this unrealistic approach to expenses and credit card usage stuck with me for that year and lingered on afterwards.