Coincidently enough I wanted a GIF for "vacation" and this gem appeared. For those who do not recognize this GIF its Vince Vaughn and Reese Witherspoon from the film "Four Christmases." I am going to summarize the film for those who don't know but about to know. The film is actually about DINKS (dual income earners with no kids) who take exotic, lavish vacations during the Christmas season. They lie to their respective families about why they cannot be with them for the holidays, like helping nonprofit organizations, and are eventually caught on national news while at the airport. So if you didn't guess I will spoil it for you. Their families see them on national television and they have to make arrangements to visit their families.
Alright, to digress from film trivia, I was inspired and irritated to write my sentiments about DINKs as I pursue my financial journey. I was mostly irritated to write about it because it feels like financial information panders to individuals who DON'T have children. "Want to build more wealth? Spend less than you earn. Take on multiple jobs to increase income. Ask for a promotion." The list will go on. I don't disagree with the points made to build wealth, but I also don't feel it is feasible for people with children or people caring for family, or even single people with no dependents. I will generalize and say that most people who want to build wealth would love to have more money to actually accomplish that goal. I do think that it is unreasonable for people with caregiving responsibilities to balance working, side hustling, caregiving, personal life, and mental health. I was exhausted just listing these things because this is my checklist. I am happy when my job is completed with integrity and my family is fed and safe. I often neglect my own creative pursuits and mental health juggling all the things. I am blessed to have a partner but I have to delegate the areas that I need help with, it doesn't naturally get done without my marching orders. That is brainpower spent on reviewing tasks, communicating/delegating said tasks when it could have been spent on something else, Y'all! Again, I acknowledged how blessed I am to have someone I can delegate work to and am grateful. I wish I could say my brain power spent on delegating household tasks is just limited to that but alas no. When caring for other humans, planning for things present and future take up so much mental space and money.
Building wealth as a DINK is easier. Two people earning income (typically high income earners) for one household can save money and take on risks to help with wealth building like side hustling, real estate, entrepreneurship, etc. The stakes are high in a two person household but not as high when your income could significantly derail others affected by your risk taking in pursuit of wealth building. Am I saying families wanting to pursue wealth cannot? Hell No!! I am acknowledging the privilege DINKs have compared to people with caregiving responsibilities. I do argue that it takes 10x more grit, confidence, and resilience for people who pursue building wealth and are providing for a family/dependent. I don't just have a partner I have to answer to when my efforts to building wealth are less than fruitful but I have a child who I also have to answer to. Even my efforts to build my finances have been less effective because I do have a child whom I do want to ensure has a good childhood. I don't want to deprive my child of playing sports, birthday parties, presents because I chose to pursue financial independence. Let me say it again. I will not deprive my child because I made a personal decision. What it means is that I have to be more creative on expenses.
This summer we chose to not pay for typical summer camps for the entire summer. We did pay for 1 week of summer camp at $150 dollars and chose to sign our child up for free or low cost summer programs because I work remote. We are blessed to have grandparents who love our child and are eager to help. We haven't needed to recruit the grandparents that much so far. We did put the money that would have been spent on summer camps into sports camps that cost from $350 to $750, and also require hotel lodging and paying for meals out. We want to lead by example that if you want to follow your passion then you have to invest in yourself. Our choice is no different than entrepreneurs paying for business coaching or businesses hiring consultants. Our child is arranged to spend 2 weeks (separate) at sports camp this summer. We have already spent $1,100 for the two camps and $1,093 for the week of hotel lodging. This would have been simply out of the question for our parents when we were growing up and we know that it is not on the priority list for other sports families we know. But again this is an investment where we don't expect any tangible ROI other than our child knowing that we support their dreams and will be their #1 supporter wherever life takes them. Do my partner and I plan to pay this kind of money for our child for years to come. Uh, nope! We do plan to teach our child to help with costs by raising money through work and saving. My partner and I have talked about privately fundraising but we don't feel on board with that idea yet because we don't feel comfortable. It's not ruled out but we also feel that we can afford these opportunities within reason.
I want to acknowledge that we all (DINKs and non-DINKs) are in different seasons of our wealth journeys. Some are still trying to figure out a financial roadmap of where they want to be while others are on the path looking forward to the horizon view. I know my journey will look different from yours and that is completely, 1000% okay. Most importantly, is that we show each other the multiple ways to reach our goals and dreams so we can get to the summit together.
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